Friday 31 October 2008

Bob's Deletionpedia page of the day

Ralph navarro

RALPH NAVARRO ACTOR


Reason for deletion: When this article was created, the writer did not include enough information to establish the the
significance of the subject.


Well... the things we do know:

  • He's an actor
  • His surname is in lower case.
  • He likes to SHOUT!

I have to laugh...


Deal or No Deal: Biggest Bonehead Move @ Yahoo! Video


I'm not a fan of Deal or No deal: this video typifies why.

Halloween


Thursday 23 October 2008

Day 2 of holiday...

Yay I'm on holiday and I had the sense to bring my laptop!

Turns out it's crap weather in Salou, Spain: cold, rainy and dark. What the....!? I have pictures but no link to download them.. but.. hey, you get the picture and you don't need a photo of rain lashing down on an outdoor pool... do you?

Oh, woe is me, where did my life all go wrong?




Why, the video of the Archies? Well this is the video that I've now watched 10 times with my 2 year old (if only to drown out the sex noises from next door.. [jealous]). It's getting me through the rainy days in a hotel room....


Sigh 11th time now...

Monday 20 October 2008

HOLIDAY TIME!

Okay screw you all.... I'm on holiday for a week.

Salou in Spain, if you must know.


Cheerio.

Bob's Deletionpedia page of the day

Lisa Lawer is a Brazilian transsexual porn star, who has appeared in numerous adult films and on numerous pornographic websites. According to the TS Identification Database, Lawer has decided on living life as a male, in order to marry a distant cousin.

I want to know more...

  • What the hell is the TS Identification Database ? (Set up by guys so they can confidently date women safe in the knowledge they're not dating a TS?)
  • What love is worth choosing a gender in order to love a distant cousin?
NO WAIT! I don't want to know anymore!

Wilhelm scream compilation



From Wikipedia

The Wilhelm scream revival came from Star Wars series sound designer Ben Burtt, who tracked down the original recording (which he found as a studio reel labeled "Man being eaten by alligator"). Although the identity of the individual who recorded the scream (which was actually one of a series of six) is unknown, Burtt uncovered documentation suggesting the scream might have been recorded by singer Sheb Wooley, who was one of the actors in Distant Drums. Burtt named the scream after "Pvt. Wilhelm", a minor character who emitted the same scream in the 1953 film The Charge at Feather River.[3] Of course, the scream itself has not been limited to English-language films and television shows either: several anime, including Island of Assassins, Sailor Moon S: Hearts in Ice, Macross, and Ranma ½, have featured at least one Wilhelm scream. It has also been used in video games.

That Hadron collider has nothing on....

Two Falcon punches colliding!!!

Prepare yourselves for a black hole people

Birthdays, Bugs, Breakages and Blues....

T'Was my birthday on 14th October (Tuesday)... I've been unable to get my laptop to co-operate since then (he just wont come to life.. hope it's not a portends). I have also had a heavy dose of the blues because my staff at work forgot it was my birthday: they neglected to give a card/say "Happy Birthday"/get a cake....

Hey, no big deal, right? Well, what about me getting their birthday's sorted out for the last 3 years?: Helping with cards/cakes and making sure they all get a birthday meal out (resteraunt of their choice and I pay for the lot) etc...

I guess it means:

  1. They forgot (Unlikely... it's on the calendar and we were talking about it recently)
  2. They hate me (Probable.. they do have a lot of dislikes)
  3. I'm an asshole (In general yeah I'd agree with that... *sobs*)


Happy Birthday to me.. *sniff*
Happy Birthday to me.. *whimper*
Happy Birthday dear... *snort* Bob the Mul
Happy Birthday.... to..... me....

Or it could mean they are a pack of selfish bitches who will never get anything from me again?

Monday 13 October 2008

Sunday 12 October 2008

Bob's Deletionpedia page of the day....

Welcome to Deletionpedia (where bad wikipedia pages go to die and then I can pick over their corpse like a rabid hungry badger... damn, should have stuck with vulture)

Today I give you a phrase from a movie that just didn't catch on...

Munsened is a verb that was coined in the movie "Kingpin" starring Woody Harrelson, Rand Quaid, Vanessa Angel and Bill Murray. It is similar terminology to "getting screwed" or being "up a creek without a paddle". Woody Harrelson plays the role of Roy Munsen who has some very bad luck throughout his life. He loses his bowling arm as a young man and becomes a deadbeat alcoholic. Later on in life he hears people using the phrase "you don't want to get Munsened in the middle of nowhere".

If you have used this phrase/term then SHAME ON YOU! ... or, if you and your friends use it all the time then.... tell wikipedia about it and let's make it relevent (Oh Gawd, what am I saying...? Just let this phase go and use screwed instead)

Rube Goldberg's pencil sharpener

(click for bigger)
Rube Goldberg: The simplified pencil-sharpener. (1930s)

Open window (A) and fly kite (B). String (C) lifts small door (D) allowing moths (E) to escape and eat red flannel shirt (F). As weight of shirt becomes less, shoe (G) steps on switch (H) which heats electric iron (I) and burns hole in pants (J). Smoke (K) enters hole in tree (L), smoking out opossum (M) which jumps into basket (N), pulling rope (O) and lifting cage (P), allowing woodpecker (Q) to chew wood from pencil (R), exposing lead. Emergency knife (S) is always handy in case opossum or the woodpecker gets sick and can't work.
Wonderful invention there from Rube Goldberg or as they* call it a A Rube Goldberg machine is a deliberately overengineered apparatus that performs a very simple task in a very indirect and convoluted fashion. Goldberg's drawings, for example, almost always included a live animal which was expected to perform part of the sequence of tasks.
*They, being Wikipedia.

Friday 10 October 2008

You have been warned!


Not sure what's the most objectionable:

  • The squeaking suspension?
  • The discarded condoms?
  • The fact that the side door of the van is left open?
  • Is it the male on male action?

I'm sure if it's being filmed you can sell that kind of action to certain websites for big bucks... so what's the big deal.. prudes?

Vanity... Palin, be thy name.

Tuesday 7 October 2008

Cocky Comedy ... what the!?

An artist's impression of a cocky guy




10 ways to charm a woman into bumping uglies with you (apparently):



10. Cocky Comedy defined: The purpose of Cocky Comedy isn’t to make a woman laugh -- it’s about making her feel ATTRACTION. Cocky Comedy is just the right mixture of cocky or arrogant and funny. Why this combination? Women aren’t attracted to lower-status men… and the cocky element implies you have high status. Healthy-minded women aren’t attracted to complete jerks either, and the comedy element keeps you out of the “complete jerk” category. If you can make a woman laugh at something you say that’s busting on her or is extremely arrogant-sounding, you’ve achieved a magical accomplishment. THAT is Cocky Comedy.



9. Mess with her: It’s critical that you switch the conversation from the normal mode to the “I’m messing with you” mode QUICKLY. To switch into this mode, give an overexaggerated compliment that can’t be real but seems way too serious; accuse her of stepping over the line and trying to pick you up in some way; complain about something in an overly serious way.



7. (Yeah, skipped 8) Push her into things as you’re walking (What the hell?). Hand her something but then don’t let go, and don’t grab something she’s handing to you. Steal her food or take the big piece. Swat her playfully with a magazine, napkin or whatever you can find. Thumb wrestle, tickle her… the possibilities here are endless.



The list goes on... (just the same kinda stuff)
Let me know if this works for you.

Hell yeah! Deletionpedia returns...

I am now submerged in glorious detailed Engrish information such as:
Nanang Dwi Cahyono, S.Kom: Person who work at ebooktops.com.

I'd like to introduce you to some of the best dressed Nazis I know...
Gay fascism: A similar term, "sodomofascist" also exists, though a Google search seems to indicate it as having less usage (94 results) than "homofascism" (1,750 results) or "homofascist" (16,100 results).
Nice use of Google ("Bobthemul" has 887 results and "Bob the mul" has 5.. take that sodomofascists!!) but I was surprised that they had links to the Gay Mafia!

And finally a legend...
Dave Green (B.A., F.G.S.) is a legend among legends. He is the only teacher of A-level Geology at Sir Thomas Rich's School, Gloucester. He is an history graduate from Keele University. While at Keele he earnt extra money teaching Geography.
He lives on a farm near Lydbrook where he keeps Ducks, Geese, Pigs, Sheep and Llamas. Each day he has to commute the 20-or-so miles to Gloucester, but it is a rewarding trip!

Welcome to Deletionpedia Dave *waves*

Why such a nice guy?

Being a child of the 80s and an owner of an Atari ST/Amiga 1200.... I missed out on the early console wars. I had my second childhood in the 90s and played my way through a lot of playstation/N64 games... then onto PS2/Dreamcast... yadda,yadda,yadda.

I never realised how different Nintendo's and Sega's views were on violence. Of course, I had heard about how Nintendo was more of a toy company and avoided bad press, like, upsetting families (American families moreso). I played a few games of Mortal kombat on the sega Mega Drive... but never played it on the SNES: Now I know what I was missing.. OKAY SEGA you're up first!!!


....and now SNES... funnly enough, if you say "snes" it does sound like an 80s version of "meh".

Pussies!!! Nintendo you may have censored the blood.. but we filled in the blanks with our evil little minds.

Monday 6 October 2008

Birthday blog happiness


Happy 22nd birthday KELLY. I hand decorated that cake y'know. Those are tears of joy in her eyes (honest)


Happy 35th birthday SARAH... who I really should have hand decorated a cake for... and I probably deserve a punch in the nuts for not doing it.

Return to the barley field






Just like previous post... the top photo was taken recently and the bottom photo is the oldest. This is the barley field that is near to where I live. I often take my son (aged 2) on a walk across it. He was a bit surprised when the field was ploughed... but you can still make out the track (I believe they are called -desire lines- by Town & Planning departments).

Earlier photos here

Glasgow thief told: Stay out of Capital (oh...and he's blind)

A BLIND shoplifter has been banned from the capital after a 10-year crime spree.
George Hamilton - who has 96 previous convictions - faces jail if he turns up in any shops, bars or restaurants in Edinburgh city centre.
Hamilton, who uses a white stick, said: "I have to keep my nose clean and keep out of Edinburgh." The 49-year-old relies on his heightened hearing, touch and sense of smell to carry out his thefts.

Cheeky Weegie Thief (could be holding toilet paper for all he cares)



He was hit with a year-long ban from the capital following his latest sheriff court appearance for shoplifting.
Hamilton, who travelled from Glasgow for his raids, will be breaching bail conditions if he goes to the city. Last night, the cheeky serial thief said: "I was gutted when I heard the sheriff say that I was getting a ban.
"It's pretty unusual to be banned from a whole city. If the police see me on the streets then I will be going to jail. "I was going through to Edinburgh quite a few times - especially from November to December. "In the run-up to Christmas, the shops are busier. He was quite a stiff judge because I didn't expect this. "I have been banned from Marks & Spencer before for shoplifting but not a whole city. "I spoke to my lawyer and he said he never heard of it before. "I travel through to Edinburgh to make a living. I am well-known in the pubs in Glasgow for selling on nicked stuff."
Hamilton - who lives with his elderly mother in the East end of Glasgow - lost his sight in 1990 after doctors told him nerves behind his eyes were damaged.
He said: "I am registered blind and must be the only blind shoplifter in Scotland - I've been doing it for years.

The Crown Office confirmed Hamilton had been given the ban on September 15.
A spokesman said: "The accused pleaded guilty and sentence was deferred until September 15, 2009. The conditions of bail state that he must not go into Edinburgh city centre in that period."

Bad kitty!



After being awoken by the sound of her own pet 11 year old cat (Bearli) screeching:

Through glazed, half-open eyes, Jane Chanteau, a 73-year-old grandmother, saw a giant animal next to her bed.

It started when Chanteau went to bed, reading a book, and fell asleep with a light on. She and her husband, Guge Punchera, live in Palo Colorado, a small settlement 11 miles south of Carmel near Big Sur in Monterey County.
After seeing the cat in the hallway, the mountain lion, about 4 feet long and 3 feet tall, rammed through the glass door, got into the house and took chase after the pet cat.
In turn, the cat dashed into Chanteau's bedroom and under the bed, the mountain lion following right behind.
That was when the scream of the cat awoke her. "I was half asleep and first I though it was a big dog, trying to get under the bed, and I whacked him on the rear end, like, 'You're not getting my baby,' " Chanteau said. Chanteau quickly exited the bed, and from the hall, she and her husband noticed that the mountain lion appeared calm and unconcerned.
"The mountain lion went from window to window like he was looking for a way out," Chanteau said. "At one point, he knocked a curtain rod down. Then he jumped on the bed and knocked a mirror over. He left a paw print in the middle of a photo that had been knocked on the floor.

Chanteau then headed to the front door. It was closed, but then, when a breeze swept through, she saw the hole in the door and the pile of glass on the floor. She then grabbed a broom, and handed it to her husband.
Punchera then talked to the mountain lion as if it could understand him. "You come out this way," he said to it, the couple recalled. Punchera said, "We've got to get out of his view, so he can find his way out."
So they both retreated. Just as Punchera figured, the mountain lion then exited the bedroom.

Once outside, the lion appeared to get his bearings, and suddenly, sprinted into the adjacent woods and disappeared.
As for Bearli the pet cat, close inspection revealed a swelling in his back from a slight puncture wound from a claw that nearly found its mark in the showdown under the bed. The cat then spent the next two days under the bed.
When she returned to work at the Esalen book store, Chanteau learned she had a new nickname.
"They're calling me 'The Lion Tamer.' "

It's like that Sharon Stone film....

A woman had a rude awakening when she discovered a hidden camera in her room. Since reporting the incident it has been revealed that a suburban Philadelphia landlord secretly videotaped 34 female tenants over two decades after hiding cameras in their apartments.


Thomas Daley, 45, was arraigned on more than 2,000 charges (holy mother of gawd that's a lotta charges) by Magisterial District Judge Francis Lawrence Jr. and waived his preliminary hearing Friday.
Daley had installed the cameras – typically one in the bedroom and one in the bathroom – in at least 7 apartments he rented to women in Norristown over the last 19 years, Reynolds said.
Daley's sophisticated set-up fed the camera images to a recording system in the basement, enabling him to view the tapes from his home via the Internet, authorities have said.
He hid the tiny cameras behind mirrors and in cabinets and ceiling fans, and some turned on with the flip of a light switch, they said.

The investigation began after a tenant discovered a camera this year and contacted police, leading to Daley's arrest Sept. 19 on charges including wiretapping and invasion of privacy. Detectives have since searched his other apartments and recovered videotapes, records and evidence that led to new charges Friday involving 34 current and former tenants.
I like the extra charges: two counts each of burglary and evidence tampering, based on his alleged attempt to break into two apartments and remove cameras after he learned of the probe. Yes, I can't get the image of the little pervert panicking after realising his own personal BIG BROTHER show was coming to an end.

I think a suitable punishment would be: A never ending interview with the talentless she-troll Davina (can you believe they gave her a talk show?) McColl. I reckon after 30 uncomfortable minutes any human being would try to top themselves.

Friday 3 October 2008

Repo man... looks familiar..



Maybe I'm not the only one saying this:

It looks like it has borrowed heavily (ripped the arse out of) the plot of Battle Angel Alita. I've only watched the trailer so I could be wrong here.....In a distant future, Earth is a mess and we focus on a city of the Have (super rich) and the Have Nots (scum like you and me) FOUND IN BOTH FILMS. The cost of organ replacement/cybernetics is generally out of reach of the Have Nots ( SPINE THEFT is a growing crime in Alita). Our protagonist’s protector turns out to be a “Repo man” (in Alita a “Bounty Hunter”)… revelations and revolutions follow.
RIP OFF!!!!
I bet I’m not the only one thinking they’ve thrown in the Moulin Rouge musical gimmick to draw in the Emo crowd and maybe salvage an OST worth flogging to the masses. EXCEPT I hear that their attempts at preventing file sharing of the OST ain’t going so well….
Click link to have a laugh, Torrent Freak explains their follies better than I ever could.

Thursday 2 October 2008

There goes another £600 million...



SPEED CAMERAS are unlawful because they have not been properly approved by Parliament, a legal campaigner said as he announced plans to challenge their use in the High Court.

Robbie the Pict (pictured above), a community lawyer from the Isle of Skye, also says cameras that trap motorists if they run a red light have been used unlawfully.

The 61-year-old, who successfully campaigned against a toll on a bridge linking the Isle of Skye to the mainland, says that since July 1992 the Government has not implemented traffic cameras through the correct legal process.

Currently the devices are signed off by the Home Secretary, but Robbie the Pict says the law states each different model of camera must be approved by statutory instrument, a technical term he describes as a mini Act of Parliament.

His case will be heard in the Scottish Court of Appeal in Edinburgh on Wednesday before he takes it to the High Court in London.

He says that if his challenge is successful, the Government could have to pay back an estimated £600 million in fines issued to motorists.

Robbie the Pict said: "The challenge is fundamental. Its point is that none of the cameras have been authorised according to statute since July 1991.

"Therefore when they (the police) say they have video evidence for a £60 fine and three points, the evidence they have is inadmissible in court."

He added: "I have decided to take it forward because I have seen so many people ripped off with these cameras and I know they are legally wrong."

Robbie the Pict decided to launch his case 18 months ago after he was caught by a red light camera in Nottingham.

Sarah Palin sex tape


Sarah Palin Sex Tape UNCENSORED


NSFW Not Suitable For World/Whoring/Watching/Work?

Going down is easy... it's the ride back up.


Mondial Du VTT Descente de Venosc caméra embarquée
Uploaded by 103TuRtLe



Not suitable if you get motion sickness.... at 10mins you will feel queasy.

Spoiler: NOBODY falls off, so can quit watching at 2mins if you like.